When I looked at this assignment I immediately
thought of a situation where I was faced with the issue of increasing child
support wanted by the ex-wife. Looking at the ten principles of new thinking I immediately
think to myself, where was these principles a year and half ago? The fact
remains that I did take these principles and approached this situation with
this frame of mind, at the old thinking.
The first issue that I had was the
fact that I didn’t communicate my side of the negotiations effectively and my
response was to get the lawyers involved. I take blame to part of the problem
because she did try and hold open dialogue and this got me now where except attorney
fees and increased child support. The issue that was faced was an increase of $150
to $175 a month in child support which I thought was crazy. In the end the
increase included a $1,000 dollar attorney bill and an increase of $425 a
month. So in the end I lost the battle when I was so engrained in fighting this
battle that I lost sight of the big picture. The children should have been the
concern all along not the fact that I wanted to win a battle against the
ex-wife. This taught me a very valuable lesson where I fostered conflict, and I
postured from the start in my response to this issue.
Looking at the new way of thinking
if these principles would have been used the fact remain that my relationship
as strained as it was could have gotten better instead of worse. This would of cost the entire change in child
support cost to go from the initial $1000 to $55 in filing fees and the support
going from $950 to $700. I know I didn’t major in economics but this would have
been a win for both sides instead this cost me dearly not only financially but
in our relationship. If I could do this all over again things would have
changed. I learned not to jump to immediate conclusions based upon feelings of
the past.
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